Don’s Dynamite – Start of 2017 Edition

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First cab off the rank is Health Minister Susan Ley who stirrred the pot and gave reason for us all to be envious.

Well you might think that flying to Brisbane (and other reported destinations currently under review) at public expense was a little over the top and even failed the ‘Pub Test’. Good work if you can get it.

No, the envy lies elsewhere. How green was I when I saw that Suzie and her partner just happened to find themselves at the Gold Coast (after their tax payer paid trip to BrisVegas) with about a lazy million bucks to spend on a residential unit.

The sheer impetuousness of the circumstances would have us all running to the Gold Coast to utter the words to our nearest and dearest. So when the Health Minister’s partner says to Suzie, “Well darl, what about we splash out with the spare cash [read about a million bucks] and buy a unit here to soak up the sun?” and Suzie replies “Well darl, perhaps we should retire to the nearest watering hole to see if your suggestion passes the ‘Pub Test'”. You have got to be kidding.

The sad thing about this is, we are told that the government is broke but me thinks that Suzie and quite a few others might be on the gravy train – from both sides of the parliament.

Next, we have our men in blue on the lookout for a missing person. What, you haven’t heard? Well if you see or hear of the whereabouts of Jobson Growth then let the authorities know pronto.

‘Who is this Jobson Growth’ I hear you say. Well that is the guy that the Prime Minister touted as being the saviour of our nation during the last election campaign. But Jobson is now nowhere to be seen.

So remiss has Jobson been that the local steadfast defender of our democratic rights, yes the Fraser Coast Chronicle, wrote an open letter to the PM asking what he was going to do about job creation in our region and country Queensland via Jobson Growth.

The PM has remained mute and Detective Keith Pitt, masquerading as our Federal Member has also fallen off the radar. No doubt like Jobson, Keith is hoping for a resurrection so he like the PM will need to wait until at least Easter.

Closer to home Submarine Sorensen continues to be totally effective at being silent – the volume of utterances of any kind from his office, on any topic, let alone employment and other issues to help residents of the Fraser Coast continues to clog media outlets not to mention my ‘in box’. Well done Teddy. Perhaps Teddy’s new strategy is based on the premise that ‘absence makes the heart grow fonder’.

On the local front, the warring factions at Council have either been over indulging in Christmas spirit or have taken to heart the meaning of Christmas and goodwill to all men (including the CEO).

No doubt like most cease-fires, hostilities will resume as the year goes on.

Perhaps we can all hang out our Santa Bags with a wish list of things that the elected councillors might do, or refrain from doing this year. This fine body of men and women will not fail to surprise/disappoint us so don’t set the bar too high.

The chosen few will be out there polishing up their white thongs and reading the latest edition of ‘Who Knows Who’. Pity the book has a limited circulation.

To finish off – President Donald is about to take centre stage.

If we are to believe what the media has coming out of the good old USA at the moment, at least in terms of Donald’s cabinet and the alleged paucity of talent contained in it, MY TIP IS that the new Chair of the Board of Governors of the Federal Reserve will be Kim Kardashian. Forget Janet Yellen, it’s all over for her.

So the next reality show to hit the airwaves will be ‘Kim’s big spend’ – good luck to those in the US of A.